"...perfect storm for back-burnered faith." LOVE that!

I think there is a direct route but I think that we humans, because we are so easily distracted, rarely find it. Detours are frequent, intriguing, and attractive. I felt a sense of relief and self-forgiveness when I read your comment about the chasm that separates us from God.

The last couple of years, since I found my way back to an active relationship with God, I have been struggling with the concept of developing a closer relationship with Him. I understand WHY I want/need to get closer, but I haven't figured out HOW to do it, at least not in a way that sticks around for very long. People say meditate and listen to God. Well, my mind stays empty for about 3 seconds and then it starts with "I'm thinking again. Stop thinking. Just listen. Hello, God? Do I need to iron a shirt in the morning? Wait, I'm still thinking..." When I asked a friend about how to get closer to God, he suggested that I should try to keep God present in my mind all day long. Maybe I’m not great at multi-tasking because simply living my life seems to make that impossible, although I get better all the time at drive-by prayers.

I do have fleeting moments when I feel close to God. Had one two nights ago, as a matter of fact, when I felt God listening to me like He was in the room. (Which He was, but...you know what I mean.) I also have moments when I hear His voice in my head. Sometimes I KNOW it's Him, sometimes I'm not quite sure if it's His voice or my heart. Like Joi, sometimes God speaks to me through things I read. It’s not necessarily something faith-y or spiritual – I recently read a passage in a novel that illuminated a difficult relationship in my life. I believe that was God speaking to me in a way He knows I will “hear.â€

I think it's all about the effort. When we stop consciously trying to connect with God, we start slipping away from Him. On the other hand, I don't think we should feel bad when we do slip - God knows that's going to happen and He loves us anyway. Always. Forever. 

Thank you for this. There is a Casting Crowns song, "Stained-Glass Masquerade," that talks about how Christians hide our flaws and problems from other Christians. I sometimes feel like I’m the only Christian who isn’t rock-solid in her faith and the practice of her faith. (In fact, more than once I have started a comment here, only to delete it because I felt like what I had to say wasn’t good enough. Silly, I know, but human.) Your highlighted statements are a wonderful reminder to me that I am not alone in my imperfection. I feel a little more faith-full right now.