KT - Good stuff. I share your concerns. I got married young (22) and am today celebrating my 8th anniversary with my wife who was 20 when we married. It has been a good marriage, but we have had many ups and downs like everyone does. Even though we got married early we sympathize with waiting, and see much value in taking time to make sure things are right. 

Marriage can't survive on instant gratification and and selfishness the way our culture so often does, and unfortunately, we as Christians don't have the best theology or practices to counter cultural/political/capitalist influences that subvert the vision of a Christian life. 

It's here in these practices and theology that we need to develop, not simply hoping people will have self-control, or talk about stuff more, but actually put into daily practice the kinds of things we need to have marriages that are mutual and help make us holy.