Jennifer, you make me blush with the "wowza" comment. :) (And full disclosure for everyone else, this is the Jen who celebrated her 14 anniversary last week.) I imagine the story about your husband's grandparents is a reality for all too many long-lasting marriages, particularly of those generations before us. Sometimes you see how "sticking it out" can pay off in the end, but so often the unhappiness just grows and ripples out, making many people miserable. I'm so glad you and Kurt are able to impact the people in your lives through your happiness and love—including your sister, who really needs your support right now. 

jenx67, I'm SO sorry—it sounds like you've really had some hurtful experiences with people. For me, all the comparisons and feelings of failure come out of my own crazy thoughts, not anything anyone else is trying to rub in my face. You're absolutely right—only someone who's gone through a divorce can understand how these feelings can get so twisted in our heads as we turn them over again and again. We certainly don't need anyone to confront us with our failures. I really hope you'll tackle that blended family post—it sounds like it would be a good process for you and a good things for many of us to read.

Jennifer (again), thank YOU, for being so open to trying to understand something you haven't experienced, for being so supportive of me and your sister, for being OK with me comparing myself to you in this post in the first place! Now that I think of it, that's just a word that has always been at the heart of who you are: Open. 

Daisy, quantity and quality both are indeed worth celebrating. Congratulations to you and your husband!

Jeb, being proud of something can be such a good and deserved feeling, and then it can so easily cross a line into something "prideful," that can become overgrown and block the light from other young plants that are trying to grow. You SHOULD be proud of your 16 years with your wife—there's no hint of that ugly pride in your feelings about your marriage, and I wouldn't want anyone to think they shouldn't celebrate and be proud of such an accomplishment. Also, it's always good to hear the perspectives of others who have been affected by divorce but haven't personally gone through one. Thanks, as always, for sharing your thoughts, friend.