Trina, I guess I connect this sort of forgiveness to grace, because I realize it isn't the sort of thing we're naturally inclined to do, as human beings. Personally, I believe it's only with the help of some divine grace that forgiveness and reconciliation can truly happen in this world.

Jamie, I think there's a lot of baggage surrounding "I'm sorry," and how we were raised to practice those words (or not). So many kids are forced by their parents to apologize for things, making it a humiliating experience enacted for the wrong reasons (not because of a sorry heart, but because of embarrassed parents). Other kids never see the adults in their lives practicing apologies, forgiveness, and the whole "kiss and make up" scene. And then we live in a culture that supports never admitting you are wrong, no matter what, especially if you're someone with power (like the president we recently had for eight years). It's no wonder that "I'm sorry" often ends up feeling contrived, is it?

jenx67, you're right—I don't think that's strange at all! It's beautiful, and it reminds us that although the world (and the human beings in the world) *tend* to behave in certain ways in certain situations, anything is possible—even exes taking shelter from storms together, or attending one another's weddings. I think there's a tremendous amount of hope in that. "Forgiveness in action for 10 years." I love that.

Arathi, thanks! We love to say "actions speak louder than words," and we love to teach our children that. But we so often fall back on the "right words" and manners, because the actions are work!

Natalie, I'm glad you're providing some balance here. :) I agree—"it can be so good to hear that the other party is sorry that they wronged you." Not good in a "I was right, you were wrong" sort of way, but in the way that clears a path for healing. Then we have to walk down that path, so to speak, rather than abandon it.

Ashley, it's so refreshing for *me* to hear that someone else has a hard time saying "I'm sorry." :) Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone in that. I experience that whole "self resentment" piece that you bring up, too. It's a vicious cycle, isn't it? Let me know if you gain any insight on how to break it.

Elizabeth, what a great way to look at forgiveness—like love. The words do matter, and we need to hear them (Jason and I tell each other we love each other all the time), but they are hollow without actions to fill them. Thanks for sharing that parallel!

Paul, vulnerability is never fun, is it? And I always worry that being vulnerable equates to being a downer. But at some point I realized how therapeutic it was for me to hear other people's stories of struggle and progress, and how much hope those stories gave me. I can't think of a better reason to share what I've worked through and learned. 

Jeb, I don't imagine you're much of a "lip service" kind of guy, judging from the authenticity of your own blog. :) Thanks for all of your encouragement, and for sharing your own authentic stories.