Joan -- re: the arranged marriage issue. I am Indian and arranged marriages are widely prevalent there as well. Mine was not arranged, and I am still happily married. I agree that to an extent nobody can predict what will happen, but it's been my experience that expectations have a lot to do with it. In an arranged marriage situation, the expectations are completely different from the start -- the emphasis is more on the social aspects of the marriage, including the family aspects of it, and less on the two people involved and their feelings for each other alone. Also, usually, the matches are made between people of similar backgrounds and economic status so a lot of the issues arising form that sort of thing are completely eliminated.... and I have to say, from what I have seen, it works more often than not..