photo robert lowe friend recently told thinks marriage stories sadden felt effects tale deep stomach state marriage felt talking marriage decade written marriage wrong number reasons secretive drama feel called focus redemptive creation arose mess feel called cumulative unhappiness mess true things complicated explain marriage's demise oversimplify leaving important details nuances perspectives learned back learn another's mistakes listened friend share struggle realized heart unhealthy marriage common thought story told friend who's marriage unfixable hard case-by-case matter marriage long-term committed relationship make partner make answer types questions talk similarities differences responses play lifelong commitment feel content fully person meant list things spirit love list energy ideas sense turn stressed confused angry faced difficult decision turning helps feel loved question inspired wise-but-cheesy book love languages written marriage relationship life hurt questions talk ultimate downfall marriage fundamental lack compatibility developed greater understanding other's perspective long 