<a href="http://www.halfwaytonormal.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/2751237878_66d6a13c44.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-224" title="2751237878_66d6a13c44" src="http://www.halfwaytonormal.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/2751237878_66d6a13c44.jpg" alt="" width="453" height="328" /></a>
<h5 style="padding-left: 300px;">Photo by <a href="http://www.flickr.com/people/10413717@N08/">Smabs Sputzer</a></h5>
Does anyone know where the conglomerate of mother-in-law stereotypes comes from? Like was there some movie or TV show with a certain type of mother-in-law—the bossy, nosy, demanding, tiring type—and it was funny so it stuck?

Or is there really some complex chemistry inherent in our relationships with our mother-in-laws? It's probably something Freud could explain. I'm going to email my friend Nathan, who’s a grad student in clinical psych, and find out.

But in the meantime, I'm also conducting a highly scientific survey about mothers-in-law on <a href="https://twitter.com/">Twitter</a> (although I’m pretty sure Nathan won’t approve of my methods, which is why he’s a psych grad student and I’m not).
<h4>The results are in: Most people <em>really like</em> their MILs</h4>
Here's how a handful of people on Twitter responded to my request "<span class="entry-content">I need some quick help for a blog post on mother-in-laws. what are the stereotypical adjectives/images that come to mind? are they true 4 u?"</span>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">@wisekaren: <em>My MIL is awesome. She and I are like 2 peas in a pod! I always say Andy married his mom. ;-)</em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">@jenluit: <em>my mil died three years ago. she was many things, but not stereotypical. She was brazen, funny, sad, loving, and super duper talented.</em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">@Mrs_PJs: <em>I think nosy is a stereotype. I have to be careful what I tell mine (who I ADORE) b/c she tends to spread news quickly.</em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">@mksteele: <em>my friend's mother in law is the spitting image of marie barone from everybody loves raymond. critical, passive aggressive, nosey</em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;"><em></em>@rharlow: <em>sorry, I'm in the LOVE category. quick question... were all you "love" responses from guys? I have a hunch they were.</em></p>
<p style="padding-left: 30px;">@Wordydiva: <em>I puffy heart my MIL... with glitter. I know this is not the case for all.</em></p>
Either no one on Twitter dared say anything negative about their own mother-in-law, or the whole mother-in-law schtick doesn’t hold water.
<h4>What makes <em>me</em> a MIL expert, you ask?</h4>
It doesn't hold water for me, and I'm sort of a mother-in-law expert (only by virtue of having had first-hand experiences with <em>two</em> MILs, as opposed to one or none).

There are many consequences of getting divorced and remarried that you never think of when you’re in the heart of the drama. You’re focused on dividing books and art and your best pans and knives, and worried about money and your kids, and how everyone’s going to hold up through it all.

<strong>You don’t sit around and ponder what it will be like to lose a whole family. At least I didn't. You certainly don't let your mind wander down the road far enough to imagine gaining a whole new family,</strong> like I eventually did when Jason and I got married in 2007.

I'm thinking about all of this, because this weekend we’re heading up to Chicago to see all of Jason's family—parents, siblings, an aunt and uncle, cousins, and even dogs (dogs-in-law?). Even though these in-laws have only technically been "mine" for about a year and a half, it seems like they've been my family for much longer (in a good way).

My father-in-law is almost a mashup of my own wonderful mom and dad. It's a really bizarre and comforting sensation. Sometimes it makes me feel <em>a bit too much</em> like Jason and I grew up in the same house. Eeww.

<strong>But then there's my mother-in-law to remind me that Jason and I did <em>not</em>, in fact, share the same childhood. </strong>Mary feels like someone I've <em>never</em> known in all my life. Not even in another life.

Mary is a one-of-a-kind, in all the best ways. She surprises me, inspires me, and makes me look at life from completely different angles. Her laugh is joyful, and she laughs freely at herself, which is far too rare a skill. Mary also gives the longest hugs I’ve ever been on the receiving end of, and she generally has a way of exuding unconditional love.

Some day I want to write her whole life story, but for now I'm going to ask her if I can share some highlights of her story here, next week. Stay tuned.