Trina, you bring up some great examples, regarding our efforts to "fix" spouses and other countries. My neighbor has a bumper sticker that says "Not every problem has an American solution."  I wonder what makes us so intent on fixing some things and so quick to discard others. 

Lori-Lyn and Ed, thanks for letting me know!

Meredith, yes, we're generally afraid of the unknown, aren't we? And one of the things we fear the most is that we'll regret something—a life-altering decision or a change of course. Rather than deal with the potential for regret, it's easier to stick with what we know. It's at least a sure thing, even if it's riddled with problems.

Laurachris2, exactly! That shift in understanding how God sees me was at the heart of my own significant reframing. And you're absolutely right: When you are able to see yourself differently, with more compassion and love, it changes how you see others. Thanks for bringing this into the conversation!

Jennifer, you're making me laugh, with your "fix dinner" comment. My response to Laurachris2, above, really fits what I want to say to you also, and I'd like to add this question: If God sees the good in us, why do so many God-believers grow up positive that God is always angry, frustrated and disappointed in us? I mean, I know the Old Testament God is a lot of those things, but why does that stick with us more than all of the OT promises God makes to his people, not to mention the entire New Testament?

Joy, thanks! I firmly believe that most things in life aren't black or white, but at the same time I think I have a love-hate relationship with the gray. It seems more forgiving and less extreme, but it can easily become a wishy-washy do-nothing blob. As you said, when things are grey, they're much easier to avoid. 

Elaine, that's such a powerful life illustration for this topic. I love how you put this: "There is a new normal for me that is full of possibilities and I have whole new perspective on everything from the mundane to the profound." I'm so thankful that you've reached this place, and that you're willing to share what you've learned with the rest of us.