Dave – I agree that getting the “stuff” out there is a huge part of it. It forces us (in a good way) to have a different kind of awareness about ourselves and our lives. In some ways, making this stuff public even holds us accountable. We’re responsible for what we’ve put out into the universe. And I do think it’s very cool that my grandma is now linked to my Love List! It’s a great reminder to have.

Granted, during times of great difficulty such as your recent one Meredith, getting to that level isn’t possible . . . but still, it is good to know that somewhere in one’s brain and one’s self that the learning place (and peace) will be reached.

Oh, and (say) ten years from now, won’t it be cool that when you’re reminded of your love list that you’ll also be reminded of your grandmother? Pretty good connection.

I think if I’d had a gratitude journal or love list when my mom died, it might have been a life raft to cling to while I bobbed in the ocean of grief. Most especially focusing on the things I loved about my mom that I would carry forward in my heart.

I love this line, as well: I can pay tribute to my grandma’s life by living my own life to the fullest—a life that doesn’t take anything for granted and celebrates the wonderfully good things I’m blessed to have.

I think living our lives to the fullest is a beautiful way to honor the dead.

Meanwhile, the Love List is one way to find a silver lining in the sadness.

A friend of mine wrote about another on her blog this fall: http://theflamingoroom.blogspot.com/2009/09/staying-open.html
My darling friend (who was grieving the sudden death of her mother) … is hunkering down with a heavy heart. What she said next though, humbled me: “I’m trying to listen for what it is I might learn from this loss.”

Kristin – Once again, thank you for the opportunity to write this guest post. Even just the writing itself was helpful for me. I wasn’t sure how others would respond, because it is such a personal story. But if by sharing my story I’m able to provide some insight or perspective to someone else in a similar – yet different – situation (like you and your grandmother), then I’m glad I followed my instincts too!

Carmen – You’re right – a good attitude and optimism really do go a long way towards helping us through the sad times. That’s why I think the Love List is a part of that good attitude. Having a tangible list (e.g., I keep my in a small notebook) gives us something concrete to literally and figuratively hold on to.

Jules – Between Kristin’s posts and the guest posts, I’ve really been amazed at how the Love List project has effected people in different ways. I think it’s a great testament to how life can take you to some pretty amazing places when you least expect it. Thank you for your prayers. They’re greatly appreciated!

I’m sorry for your loss M. I pray your love list continues to bring you a source of joy and a way to celebrate your grandma’s life. :)

Much love and peace!

Jules!

Meredith,
I find your story touching, and at the same time so interesting that I would read this today. I’m just home from a funeral this afternoon. Not someone I knew directly, the mother to a good friend. And in this case it was not unexpected, and it was time. It was still sad, though, thinking about life, and the ending of it. Although, I like to think that this isn’t the end, that this is only the beginning – the beginning with something much greater beyond. Of course, losing a loved family member is not easy. Today, I shared in that sadness, and then laughed at the good memories from years past – and a glimpse into a life I didn’t know.

Life here on earth is not fully known…really – what’s next. And that’s okay, we have this moment – now. And that’s really where this love list idea is so beautiful. Because, for me, that list is a lot of things – especially, though – it’s the moments. Those little moments that mean so much. And I’ll take them, and I’ll love them…and whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll know that love is always there, and love is always good.

Meredith, thank you so much for sharing your story, especially today – as I think more deeply about what this idea of “moment” means to me…